Part One: Sore Loser / Part Two: Wet Behind The… Everything

By: Gold Hawk

Part One: Sore Loser

SH, DH, BH and myself went to a flea market where apparently there would be many soakers to buy. In the end we didn’t find anything so we went back to my house and decided to start a water fight. We decided to have a game we call Soak the Flag which is like capture the Flag except instead of capturing it, you soak it. By the way; Flag = paper towel. Anyway, the teams were DH and me, and SH and BH. I hid our flag in BH’s backyard and they hid theirs on a chair on my back porch.

Armaments:
Me: my trusty Helix
DH: Hose (he was base defense)
SH: Flash Flood and Max-D 2000
BH: Superman shield blaster

We started the game. I went on a sneak attack and made it to the bottom of the porch steps. My brother spotted me and I took off. He shot me a little bit with his Max-D, but I avoided most of the water. I went back to our base and talked to DH. We formulated a plan. We put it into action. I went back thew way I had come when I ran from SH. He wasn’t at the base or so it seemed. As this was happening, DH had snuck to SH’s hose and secured it. I heard SH coming back so I backed up and then ran up the driveway towards where DH was. SH spotted me and gave chase. I yelled to DH to turn the hose on. He did. SH ran right into the blast. He got pretty wet. He went back to his base. Kent pulled the hose along. I went up the stairs and right in front of me was his flag. I got ready to soak. Suddenly, SH jumped out with his gun pointed at my heart. I yelled as a shot hit my chest. DH came up behind me and shot SH in the.. everything. SH ran away and yelled that he was going to soak our flag. As he ran away I shot his flag and completely marinated it. About 45 seconds later SH made it to our flag and being a sore loser, soaked it. In the end we never ran into BH. It turned out he was inside eating lunch.

Results: GH/DH Team Wins!

Part Two: Wet Behind The… Everything

After the Sore Loser battle, SH went over to BH’s house to play. So DH and I decided we would have a 1-on-1 duel.

Armaments:
Me: My trusty Helix
DH: SH’s Max-D2000 and later my hose

I started on my back porch and DH started on my front porch. I went around my house on the side that didn’t have the hose on it, and got to the sidewalk out front. I walked towards the driveway and got to the end. All of a sudden, DH popped up from behind the hedge that is in front of my front porch and shot me in the shoulder. I shot him a couple times and then I ran back the way I had come and got back to my base. Then I heard the sound any soaker warrior hates: the sound of your enemy turning on a hose.

I hid behind a garbage can at the bottom of my back porch’s steps. Sadly, DH saw me. He came up the back steps of the porch and turned on the nozzle. I squeezed of a shot in his direction as he was turniong on the nozzle but I never got to see it hit him. In fact I don’t even know if it hit him because a half second after the helix of water left my gun, the hose shot a fan blast at me and in the next half second I ducked back behing the garbage can. Water thudded down on the top of the garbage can and dripped down on to me. After about 30 seconds of this, I ran out and went up the hill on the other side of the porch. I was pretty soaked. I got to the sidewalk again and  heard DH coming up the driveway side of my house. I ran back to my base and BH and SH were there playing. I told them to keep it down. I ran to the back steps and looked down the driveway. DH was at the sidewalk and he turned and went past the hedge. I made my move. I ran to the wall spigot where the hose was connected. I planned to turn it off and when DH came after me he would be unarmed. I got to the spigot and I heard DH coming back. I quickly turned the faucet. I turned it up instead of down. I heard DH behind me and then I yelled “I surrender”. A split second later I felt a blast of ice cold water hit my back. I yelled again. The water kept on coming. The next time I screamed, ‘I SURRENDER!” He finally turned it off. I was SOAKED! If there was a dry part of my body it would have been about a micrometer in diameter. Everything was soaked.

Results: DH wins